Parallel #6: Fade

Whatever happened to chasing rainbows?

Bare-footed stumbles in the dead of night, asphalt and glass and gum. Gazing at stars and laughing till we couldn’t breathe. Exposing their lies. They never knew us. We were the only ones.

Nostalgia at the end of the moon.

Rows of possible suitors in indigo as deep as it goes. Promises never broken but never required. A hint, though; now a hint keeps the blood flowing. Keeps the signs alive and not dried out forever [slumped in the corner of a bus shelter, crumpled pad in frozen hand].

Vampires and aftershock and the smell of leather. Poppers and patchouli. Possibility is resuscitation for the mind. Breathe it in. Get that potion [emotion] pumping through. Then, suddenly, enough of the cold tabacco-tinged air; jet off to Berlin,

make him love you because it’s inevitable. Look at the moon your anchor. But you never do it because that’s for another lifetime, another version of you who is free to live and doesn’t need this so very badly as a mcguffin. I am what I am.


Pulled together by kook and ale. Pointed shoes and backcombed hair. Singles on cassette from Our Price. Marble arch and other assorted landmarks. Mark the territory. Carefully [recklessly] creating the maps under our skin. Tracing them, tattooing them. What it is like to be a bat. What it is like to be trash on the street. The gaps between the ordinary. Dancer in the dark lands. Slipping away yet living in fuller blood than ever before. Fading, becoming ghosts on the street. Litter with dreams. Lies that make you happy. Trembling

fingers, nails painted black. Tempered vein open once again. Tributary undammed. Access the memories, the arches, the stones unturned.

Whatever happened to you?

Stemming directly from the Journal Sequences project, Parallels is part stream of [sub]consciousness, part exploration into recurrence and association. Spirals of awareness. Rhythms in thought. Accidental spells in everyday life, hidden beneath the surface. A series of loosely formed vignettes to mythologise the instant.

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club / The Exploding Boy / Berlin Black / Solar Fake / Suede / Vampires / Kathy Acker / Will Self / the Abyss

Header image credit: Abbie Togstead via Unsplash

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