Attempts at Sanity

I went into the dark ages and was hung as a witch to find my sanity. Yellow foul coated my throat. I went on a journey across timelines to find my sanity, guided by an avatar called M. Chapel perilous, ghosts in the app, to the moon and back. Got caught in a loop where… Continue reading Attempts at Sanity

Journal Sequence #17: Chaotic Wave [Papier-mâché Devil]

I’m falling anyway. Back to the ground. Face the sky, clouds cover the sun [sin]. Black buildings morph into wobbly paint streaks. Obscure. Empty space. The reappearance of the weaver. Old scents, new memories. The feel of my brush against the canvas, my pen upon the page, steadily [frantically] creating a new reality before I… Continue reading Journal Sequence #17: Chaotic Wave [Papier-mâché Devil]

Journal Sequence #16: TV for a Head [discourse]

Tired of all this noise in language I don’t understand. I try the tongue, even carry it for a while, then realise they were never saying what I thought. Layers deep this symbolism, these insinuations. Playing a game that never existed on my home world. Long for it now. Reach for it with both hands,… Continue reading Journal Sequence #16: TV for a Head [discourse]

Creative Spirit Cannot Be Looked in the Eye

I found a quote that rings so very true to me. “Many artists can only produce because they don’t know what they are producing: the moment they know, the creation is completely stopped. For then they begin to reflect; then they feel responsible and cannot play like the gods, unless they fulfil the psychological demand… Continue reading Creative Spirit Cannot Be Looked in the Eye

Journal Sequence #14: Beautiful Hailstones [I am you]

The first rule of autofiction is that no one admits they’re writing autofiction. They’ll refer to ‘my narrator’ and ‘the plot’ as though they were something other than parts of the author themselves. They are, of course, parts that are not generally accepted explorations. A narrator can indulge in solipsism but a person cannot. The… Continue reading Journal Sequence #14: Beautiful Hailstones [I am you]

Journal Sequence #12: Poetic Animus [around here]

The poetic animus appears in a dream, just out of reach. Images of elevators flash into my mind. I project them like ghosts onto the big screen. If you tell someone you’re going to do something, while subconsciously projecting animus upon them, it will almost certainly happen. “I’d kill to relieve the burden.” Ah, the… Continue reading Journal Sequence #12: Poetic Animus [around here]

The Writing and The Writing

My initial draft of anything is a series of flowing fragments. They are ideas, images, thoughts and feelings. They are connected by an overarching concept, but that would be unclear to anyone reading them at this stage. This writing is what I’m most in love with. I have never felt freer than when I am… Continue reading The Writing and The Writing

Journal Sequence #9: There are Snakes Inside [Dreamframe]

But there are snakes inside. One coils ever tighter around my heart and laughs. Another guards the rib cage, all smug. Another shoots venom into my gut. Another squeezes its head into my skull and talks to you through my mouth, my eyes. My breath, my only weapon. Exhale. Expand. Robots, the lot of them.… Continue reading Journal Sequence #9: There are Snakes Inside [Dreamframe]

Journal Sequence #8: Terrific [Runes]

The journal is the writer’s sketchbook. Document what you see, rough out whims and fantasies. Allow fragments and the poorest of punctuation. Allow any form whatsoever. Allow reality to melt into fiction. Stop thinking about how this will be perceived. There is no observer. We are only waves here. The dark-skinned lady with her bald… Continue reading Journal Sequence #8: Terrific [Runes]

Glue in the Head

Stuck. Looking at the manuscript. Not in detail, just the mass of it flat on the table. 74 pages of Calibri Regular, unevenly spaced. Sheets of notes torn up and spliced in with sticky tape. Hand-written jots in the margins, sometimes spanning pages, the only indication of place given by asterisks and little numbers in… Continue reading Glue in the Head